weekend escapades.

went to the twins game on saturday. we won - which is always fun! i had a delicious hot dog - with ketchup and relish. the boy had mustard and onions. (do our complete opposite hot dog choices mean we're incompatible?)

also had peanuts and crackerjacks. (and sang the song!) baseball game complete.

after the game, the boy and i headed to the strip club. this was only the second time i've ever been to a strip club, and both times were mostly the same experience. while i appreciate the fine looking ladies, (and even get a little turned on once and again), i have a hard time getting over the fact that a lot of them don't seem to be having much fun, and whenever i leave i always vow to never eat again. which inevitably fails and leaves me eating an entire pint of chubby hubby crabby. so i guess i'd rather leave strip club fantasies to the boy, and imagine myself as skinny and pretty as all of those ladies - that's my fantasy. we did buy each other a dance though, and i had way too many vodka ginger ales.

(as a side note, my mother's drink weakness was vodka 7-ups. she would always drink way too many. apparently that has carried on in me, but with a ginger-ale twist. yippee!)

i had a brief idea that i should start being a stripper. mostly because of this blog. i need some more cash, and it seems like something i could do. however, besides needing to lose somewhere around 20 pounds for that to happen, i don't know if i could really do it. in my head it seems like a good reasonable idea, but who knows if i could actually go through with it - or make any real money at it. well, that's another potential job to cross off the list.

here's my random weirdo story for the week: I was working out at the gym on Saturday morning, early, and was the only person there (which is usually the case on the weekends). right as i was finishing up my workout, a guy walks in. he's a pretty big guy, and doesn't smile. he starts (loudly) lifting weights. by loudly i mean the gross grunts and yells he lets out when doing said lifting. that's not the weird part though.

i go to take a shower, leaving my water bottle and headphones on the rack where all the shoes and bags are. i always do this - because who wants my germy water bottle and broken headphones covered in sweat? these headphones are not nice - not nice at all. the pads broke off long ago, they're the clunky, behind the head kind, and i only wear them because they get so sweaty when i work out that i'm afraid to use my ipod earbuds and ruin them. ok, enough description i guess - but they're gross!

so I come out of the shower, and notice...my headphones are gone. i look over at the treadmills, and that weird guy is wearing them! my headphones! that he saw me take off my sweaty head! seriously folks, gross. i was tempted to walk over and demand them back, but a. he's huge and mean looking, and b. what would i do with them, now that they have his ear sweat all over them? yeah, no thanks.

then on sunday - more craziness ensues. i wanted to get some work done on my computer, which i cannot do at my house because there is far too much TV. and food. and a bed. so i headed out to a coffee shop. after trying spyhouse and bad waitress, and finding them both full - i head over to a dunn bros by the boy's place - because there's usually tables. i was elated to find a big table, with a comfy chair, and settled in with my chai and a muffin.

then this weird feeling started to nag at me. the boy sitting next to me - do i know him? he looks familiar....but...do i really know him? so as i'm furiously glancing at him i notice he's doing the same. damn, i must know him.

then it hits me. this is the guy. the totally embarrassing guy who i have seen twice, and thinking about either time makes me cringe. the first time we met i was at ground zero with some friends. i drank way too much (yes, this is a pattern) and made out with this guy. found out his name is name removed steve. all i really remember is telling him that he looked like a guy from Dawson's Creek. Our makeout session ended with me getting thrown out of the bar. good times.

the next time i saw this guy was when i was checking into the psych ward. that's obviously a whole other post, but needless to say, seeing a guy that you've made out with while in the psych ward (which I didn't notice, but my friends kindly pointed out to me later) - is not so pleasant. note: he wasn't in with me, which would be less embarassing, he was a nurse.

why do I keep running into this guy? and what am I supposed to say? I ended up fleeing dunn bros in the end, and not getting any work done. what can i say? - i'm a coward.

so that was my weekend. a little bit crazy, a little bit fun, a little bit embarrassing. like most of my life, i guess.